Wednesday, August 25, 2010
In the quiet
In the quiet, before dawn hours I can hear the branches of the oak tree scrape against our chimney.
In the quiet I can hear my cat's purring, so loud it mimics an idling car engine.
In the quiet I can hear the fish tank gurgle in the kitchen.
And it's in this quiet, this soft, dark silence, though, that what i hear most is God whispering to me.
I wrote on facebook yesterday that I was dog tired. School starting up again has plum wore me out. The house for the last 2 days has been chaotic, messy and LOUD. Boys in a hurry, boys hungry, boys from the neighborhood in and out, boys talking, laughing, running in and out. Boys being well, boys.
It was hard to find the quiet.
For those of you that know me well, you know that I'm a worrier. I worry about everything. The boys, the boys at school, the boys playing ball, the boys skateboarding down the street, the weather, the car being serviced, my parents, Vance, work. GAH - work alone can send me over the edge and deserves it's own post so i'm not even going to go there right now. But you get the picture. I needed the quiet.
I needed to quiet my brain. I needed to talk to God. I mean really, sit down, have a cup of coffee and catch up. Do you ever get like that? Like, "hey! I haven't talked to you in so long? I've missed you!" Please don't get me wrong, every day i am faithful to thank Him but I'll be honest, I have not set aside time lately to really really catch up. Of course He knows what I'm living through, but he wants us to come to him. Rejoice with Him in everything good that happened and bring Him everything we're struggling with. And He wants you to stop. Catch your breath. Spend some time with Him. Not give him what I call "hey, can i hit you back?" text. You know what I mean.
Nothing is too trivial to discuss either. That's what I love the most. I can bring him my worries as deep as the ocean, as significant as life and death, but I can bring him the small stuff too. What? you don't think he wants you to lay that down as well? Ha! Bring it ALL sugah. He will listen and take it all in and work it through with you. Small arguments. Overtaxed schedules. Diets. YES DIETS. (Hey, we all have our demons ok, and mine happens to be those brownies that i made for the boys lunches this week.)
Here is a great reminder that I pulled from www.thelordsprayer.net
You say: "It's impossible" God says: All things are possible (Luke 18:27)
You say: "I'm too tired" God says: I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28-30)
You say: "Nobody really loves me" God says: I love you (John 3:16 & John 3:34)
You say: "I can't go on" God says: My grace is sufficient (II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalm 91:15)
You say: "I can't figure things out" God says: I will direct your steps (Proverbs 3:5-6)
You say: "I can't do it" God says: You can do all things (Philippians 4:13)
You say: "I'm not able" God says: I am able (II Corinthians 9:8)
You say: "It's not worth it" God says: It will be worth it (Roman 8:28)
You say: "I can't forgive myself" God says: I Forgive you (I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)
You say: "I can't manage" God says: I will supply all your needs (Philippians 4:19)
You say: "I'm afraid" God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear (II Timothy 1:7)
You say: "I'm always worried and frustrated" God says: Cast all your cares on ME (I Peter 5:7)
You say: "I don't have enough faith" God says: I've given everyone a measure of faith (Romans 12:3)
You say: "I'm not smart enough" God says: I give you wisdom (I Corinthians 1:30)
You say: "I feel all alone" God says: I will never leave you or forsake you (Hebrews 13:5)
Can I get an amen?